Posts Tagged ‘toxic shame’

Core Shame Identity vs Toxic Shame

Core Shame Identity vs Toxic Shame (the following is extracted, in part, from the forthcoming book’s introduction) The notion of shame to which most people refer is an emotional experience or state that waxes and wanes in response to specific triggers and cues, not unlike any other emotion. But there is also what can be considered the trait of shame, a more durable, unyielding and chronic manifestation of shame. It is as stealthy as it […]

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Shame Book

Shame Book (in progress……) Hi to everyone! All apologies for my prolonged absence. All is well. I just wanted to let folks know that I have been busy working on another book. It is tentatively entitled Perfect Pain/ Perfect Shame. It essentially is a further exploration of the philosophies and practices of what I term Integrative Mindful Exposure with specific application to the issue of “Toxic Shame” or what I prefer to refer to as […]

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Recognizing Toxic Shame

Recognizing Toxic Shame is possibly the first and most critical step in learning how to work with the experience of shame. But, in order to do so, we must be able to identify it’s presence and effects. The following is a selection of items from the Personal Shame Inventory (PSI) which was presented in its entirety in the fourth chapter of the book, “How To Lose Control”.  The primary reason that I developed this inventory, […]

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Shame and Anxiety: Redux

Shame and Anxiety: Redux   I stated in the previous post that anxiety is not an emotion, but that in fact emotions are often embedded within the experience of anxiety. In my experience, one of the biggest culprets is shame. As I had long a go stated, shame can be likened to a ninja or perhaps , better yet, a vampire since shame is extremely stealthy, can transfigure itself into other emotional experiences, all in […]

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Emotional Exposure: Surfing Toxic Shame

Emotional exposure in action So from time to time I will post a case illustration depicting the utilization of Integrative Mindful Exposure techniques such as the Emotional Surfing exercise. This particular exercise is from a recent session which might help illustrate the relationship between anxiety and toxic shame. As I indicated in the last post, anxiety may often have at its core not fear as is often assumed, but shame. This middle age woman, with […]

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Toxic Shame and Anxiety

I am increasingly discovering that many experiences that appear to be symptoms of anxiety actually are manifestations of toxic shame. Some research is emerging that is giving support to this observation. So for example, a significant subset of individuals with social anxiety disorder (anxiety and avoidance of social settings and activities such as public speaking) may actually be a manifestation of shame. It only makes sense that people who at their core feel badly about […]

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Vampire Hunting: Finding and Naming Toxic Shame

Toxic shame, by its very nature is furtive, secretive and incredibly slippery. It loves to evade detection (attention) and loves to live in the dark hidden recesses of our psyche. Like a vampire, it hates the light of day (mindful attention). The first step toward working with shame is to learn how to detect it and then how to train the flashlight of our mind on it. Why is it so secretive? Toxic shame is […]

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